The Call (rfs) - Scarlett Johansson/Natalie Portman

My first RPFS, first slash and first fanfiction EVER :D

Word Count: 1,016 words
Pairing: Scarlett Johansson/Natalie Portman
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Natalie and Scarlett are so real and perfect that sometimes I wished they were just figments of my mind, like the rest of this story :P
Summary: Scarlett and Natalie had a brief fell-out after the infamous kiss in Germany. The story is about Natalie coming to terms with whatever happened between them and trying to find a solution for it.
Author's Notes: Please tell me if you think there should be a next part to this :)

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I think I'm developing this obsession on someone not real. It's not my fault though, because she is too hypnotising a person to not fall in love with.
Jenny Schecter...

Two Steps Forward

Song: Two Steps Forward
Artist: Emmy the Great

In the middle of September we entertained the thought

of falling into rabbit holes and never coming out

in the garden of a girl who's mum is friends with Elton John, so she kept telling us

we just let it pass

and slipped a year or so behind ourselves

the time's already gone,

when people were just people not the jobs that they perform

our songs were just a thing we did with melody's and chords

now you're available in all good record stores.


i knew you best back when love was just a feeling that ran out between my legs onto the, back of my dress

onto the clothes that i was wearing

when i was a child i was expected to believe

in something up above that no one touches or can see

but now they tell me that unless you're looking out of magazines well then you don't exist but i knew that you were real before i read it

in an interview today before i used you as a surface - did a line across your face

in the toilet of a girl who's sitting outside dropping names like they were carpet bombs, she knows everyone

but, i knew you first back when love was underneath you with my fingers in the dirt,

you said "i'll stop if it hurts"

you said "i'll stop it if it's scary,"

you said "you know that i can stop this any time,

if you think that it is tearing"

and i think of you when the leaves are brown,

i think of leaves that i have felt against my body on the ground

i think of places where we could go to now until they find us 'til they catch us, 'til they wake us and

we drown until I know where i am

i'm in a garden of remembering your fingers in my hand, were like a book made of sand

was like the book that i was reading, was like the book that i had with me all the time

to tell me i was breathing

and its the middle of September.

your image starts to fade into the one that they have printed on the 27th page

don't like to read these things you know i do it anyway i have no choice

have no choice i say

and i go out into the garden the birds begin to sing i am troubled by the thought of all the daylight they will bring

i think that i will let somebody take me home again before the evening ends i will forget with them that i..

knew you at all

that my love was underneath you making puddles on the floor

and that i sleep to the thought of

two people walking two steps forward always to the lives they've chosen clicks and hums and sirens and the sun

of two people walking two steps forward always to the lives they've chosen, clicks and hums and sirens and the sun

of two people walking two steps forward always to the lives we've chosen clicks and hums and silence and the sun
  • Current Music
    Two Steps Forward - Emmy the Great
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Why are we so scared of death? That’s the question whose answer I’ve been looking for but never found. I am scared of death. But why?

What is death anyway? The dictionary says that death is the action of dying or being killed, the end of a person’s or an organism’s life. It also defines “die” as “stop living”, “live” as “be alive and not dead”, which doesn’t really make much sense in the end. How do you define “life”? Does “breathing” mean “living”?

In a way, death is the defunct state of the body. What I don’t understand is that when we die, will all our thoughts and feelings and visuals just disappear? Just like that and it seems like they’ve never been there at all? I mean, the physical part of death is visible, it’s obvious to everyone. What about the state of the mind? Where do they go? The idea of my thoughts vanishing like they’ve never existed is very likely what petrifies me.

I don’t know if I believe in afterlife, or ghosts. They’re probably just as scary as death. Do they really exist? How are these people feeling? Do they have relationships with one another like we do? I’m not sure if I want to know.

I don’t know why I’m thinking about this right now, and it’s actually quite intimidating that I am. I’m a little afraid now, I guess. Some of my family members are very unwell, some of them are not long for this world. I’ve never had any experience with death before, so I’m not sure if I can handle it well when I have to. I know I will have to, some day. All I can do is to keep my fingers crossed and hope that the day will come later rather than sooner.
  • Current Mood
    confused confused
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